oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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