do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
