winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
