im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
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