so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
