Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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