your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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