We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Randomize
