is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
Randomize
