how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
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