'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
that may or may not have been my penis.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
