The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
Randomize
