If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
