btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
