the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Randomize
