I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Someone signed my nipple.
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