Texts From Last Night

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  (813): View more from Florida

  so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol

  (1-813): View more from Florida

  well its been awhile since I've surfed

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  (813): so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol (1-813): well its been awhile since I've surfed http://tfl.nu/lkwy
  Replies (4) Good night (2127) Bad night (611)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...

  (1-203): View more from Connecticut

  your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen

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  (203): he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible... (1-203): your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen http://tfl.nu/mgfl
  Replies (20) Good night (5657) Bad night (1252)
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  (903): View more from Texas

  I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.

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  (903): I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again. http://tfl.nu/pun6
  Replies (39) Good night (4491) Bad night (1055)
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  (808): View more from Hawaii

  You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.

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  (808): You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him. http://tfl.nu/k2hw
  Replies (27) Good night (1698) Bad night (3364)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere

  (1-727): View more from Florida

  it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man

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  (727): the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere (1-727): it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man http://tfl.nu/dnxw
  Replies (6) Good night (3924) Bad night (905)
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.

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  (708): I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious. http://tfl.nu/uku0
  Replies (16) Good night (1728) Bad night (3448)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going

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  (519): I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going http://tfl.nu/hix8
  Replies (4) Good night (2955) Bad night (1265)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom

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  (214): Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom http://tfl.nu/1svl
  Replies (6) Good night (1199) Bad night (2174)
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  (347): View more from New York

  Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.

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  (347): Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times. http://tfl.nu/buvd
  Replies (5) Good night (565) Bad night (1279)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...

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  (704): So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ... http://tfl.nu/bcgx
  Replies (5) Good night (580) Bad night (1231)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.

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  (937): Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams. http://tfl.nu/nyo6
  Replies (10) Good night (1178) Bad night (621)
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  (972): View more from Texas

  I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.

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  (972): I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors. http://tfl.nu/zrt1
  Replies (5) Good night (719) Bad night (791)
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  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.

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  (774): so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day. http://tfl.nu/ddu7
  Replies (4) Good night (906) Bad night (329)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  ...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.

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  (+44): ...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like. http://tfl.nu/l06q
  Replies (0) Good night (392) Bad night (273)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.

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  (520): She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings. http://tfl.nu/91ue
  Replies (0) Good night (247) Bad night (221)

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