Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
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