it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
It's shark week go big or go home
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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