I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Randomize
