David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
Just took my morning after pill in the library
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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