Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
