Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
