I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
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