what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
I miss vodka workout Fridays
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Randomize
