Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
