CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
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