I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
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