Grow some girl-balls and come out already
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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