TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
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