ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
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