'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Randomize
