There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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