I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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