I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
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at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
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by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
how drunk are you?
Several
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