you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Randomize
