You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
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