I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Randomize
