i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Randomize
