he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
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