I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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