So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
