i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
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