yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
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