check it out our google latitudes are spooning
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
Randomize
