He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize
