OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
