a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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