Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
I'm at about main and main street
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
