And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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