Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
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